Emma Grace Lockwood

That is the name of the baby girl I am blessed to be carrying in my belly right now. I could NOT contain my excitement yesterday when we found out that our baby is a GIRL!

As long as I can remember, I have always wanted a daughter. I have always wanted to have a mother/daughter relationship, and God in is infinite power, has decided to make my dreams come true.

I can't wait until the day that Emma is born and they place her on my stomach and I look into the eyes of my daughter. Daughter...I love that word. I love it when it's used because of me. I love being a daughter to my parents. My mother and I didn't always have the best relationship...my middle school years were pretty rough, and I didn't always treat my mother with the respect that she deserves. But as I have gotten older, I have come to know and love my mother in a deeper way than I ever have in my life. I think when daughters become mothers...the mothers take on a more special role.

I will never forget calling my mother on NUMEROUS occassions when my oldest son was a baby/toddler and saying these words, "Mom, if I was anything like Timmy is right now..God Bless You!" Me becoming a mother thrust me into my mother's world. I was so far from home, and yet my mother was ALWAYS there for me...day or night. Everyday that my mother is on this earth, is sweeter than the day before.

I loved getting to call my mother yesterday to tell her she will have her 2nd granddaughter. I love that I will now have new "mother" things to talk about with raising my daughter. I am so blessed beyond words for this wonderful gift. I pray that my relationship with Emma will be just as close as my relationship with my mother. My mother has been my rock this past year, and I hope to one day be able to be that "Rock" for Emma.

Thank you God for my daughter!

My Little Boy Silas

Do you like Silas' hair? If you know my Silas, then you know he sucks his two middle fingers on his right hand and twirls his hair with his left hand. This used to happen all the time, but lately, we have noticed that he only sucks his fingers when he is tired, going to sleep or has gotten in trouble. Since he "twirled" his hair in his fingers, we had been keeping his hair a little longer on the top. It got to the point where the hair was just unruly. I mean, it would just NOT lay down and it got too long to "style". So, Saturday, I asked Ed if we would cut the boys hair. He has already been cutting Timmy's hair, and I finally gave in and told Ed to cut Silas' hair short all over. I must say...he looks quite adorable with his hair cut so short. He no longer can "twirl" his hair, but he rubs and pats his hair instead. He looks like such a big boy.

Everytime I look at him now, I realize he is going to be a big brother. I can't believe that Silas is not going to be the "baby" anymore. I know that my baby isn't due until January, and I will cherish EVERY moment of this time keeping Silas as my baby. At the same time, he will need to transition to a big boy bed because the crib needs to be for the baby. The bed is already set up in Timmy's room, but the thought of Silas being more mobile isn't something we are quite ready for. I always look at the boys before I go to bed, and last night, I noticed that Silas is getting so long, that he really only has about a foot left before he will be too big for the crib. I guess one day, we are just going to have to get brave and try it out.

I know...he can't be a baby forever...but he will always be "my" baby! A gift God gave to me the summer after I miscarried the first time. God is good, all the time, all the time, God is good.

Not Me Monday!

Welcome to Not Me! Monday! This blog carnival was created by MckMama. You can head over to her blog to read what she and everyone else have not been doing this week.

I most certainly did NOT leave a load of wet towels in the washer all night on Saturday. I then most certainly did NOT just wash them again on Sunday night. They are most certainly NOT still in the washing machine on Monday morning. I always stay on top of my laundry duties!

I did NOT go to Wally world during my lunch break last week, and I did NOT buy Gatorade, Swiss Cake Rolls and Almond Joys. This is NOT the wierdest pregnancy craving I have had this go round...I am NOT still enjoying those Swiss Cake Rolls at my desk. YUM!

I have NOT been counting down the days to find out the sex of the baby in my belly. I am NOT secretly hoping for a little girl. I am NOT planning to take a half day on "the" day so that if baby is said girl, I will NOT go and buy something pink. (Note: I WILL be thrilled if it's another boy, but there is no harm in hoping for a girl)

Here's what I did NOT do...how about you?

17 weeks and growing

So, here you have it. My very first pregnancy picture this time around. I have been meaning to take a picture before now, but I never seem to remember when Ed or I have a camera. I can't believe it's been 17 weeks. My next appointment is on August 11th, and at that appointment, I will make THE appointment. You know, the appointment where they check all the baby's body parts and organs...the appointment where we will know if I am carrying our Emma Grace or our Jacob Neal. I can't wait to find out...I will really be happy with whatever God has blessed us with, but I am secretly hoping for a little girl. I am outnumbered right now, and would LOVE to have another girl on my side. Plus, this pregnancy has been different than with the boys. I have been sick, sick, sick all the way up to last week. So, 16 weeks of feeling sick is yucky, but so worth it.

I have to tell you something that Timmy said last night that was just precious. I had a craving for Wendy's Chili. I know...it's in the heat of the summer, and I want hot chili...but the baby wants what the baby wants. Anyway, I am sitting there eating my chili sitting next to Timmy, and with every bite that goes into my mouth, I am making a sound like "Mmmmmm". (If you are a member of my family...you can remember this sound well.) He looks at me, rubs my belly, and then says, does the baby like that chili? I just smiled at him and said, absolutely!

I am hoping to continue updating this blog about my pregnancy. I am finally feeling better and have a ton of energy that I didn't have for the past 16 weeks. Stay tuned...I will let you know THE appointment date next week.